Saturday 7 February 2009

Emu's demise

I thought Emu was still alive? but just a bit deflated and unemployed without the sweet insertation of the very dry-skinned and strangely brown hand of Rod Hull. Although I hear Bernie Clifton had a go at riding Emu (egged on by his remaining arch rival Keith Harris) at some LSD fuelled party. Bernie couldn't take the jeers of 'Rod was the King of Birdy manipulation, Not you Clifton' and ' WANKER' so went for it to prove a point.... but it wasn't quite the same as his converted Ostrich/trouser gizmo..

I hear he was laughed out of the squat as once he had 'got into' the Emu, he'd failed to notice his cock was hanging out of Emu's neck as it had suffered some wear and tear since Rods departure (not Bernies cock).. kicked around by most of the staff in BBC TV Centre, Wood Lane at lunchtimes.. Bernie went on for 10 minutes doing his 'standard' routine with his hand shunting into Emu's head - making quacking motions... raised bandy-leg walking.. and generally strutting about the squat.. jutting his head as he went.. and thought he'd finally found form again..

Ian Brown, who was discreetly slumped in the corner.. sat upright briefly to shout.. Bernehhhhhhhhhhhhhh.. your cocks out maiiiiite.. fort I'd say like man.. s'not a cool look maiiiite.. it looks laiiike Emu's dropped his lunch.. etc

Well, you could have pulled the rug from under Bernies well used flat-feet..He quickly disappeared into the night, bird attached... with taunts of 'CUNT' and 'FUCK OFF YOU TWAT' echoing behind him..

Can anyone clear up this mystery??

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